I clicked 27 eCommerce ads last month. 25 of them lost me before the page even loaded.
Some had stunning design. Others offered 50% off. But almost all failed the only test that matters: Do I instantly understand what they sell – and why I should care?
If your landing page doesn’t pass that test in under 3 seconds, you’ve already lost the sale. And it’s not a design issue – it’s a clarity issue. Most bounce rates are blamed on “bad traffic.” The truth? Bad messaging.
Confused visitors don’t convert. And even small copy changes can lead to huge performance lifts.
Most brands don’t need more ads. They need to fix what happens after the click.
Here’s how to rewrite your landing page so it actually converts.
1. Make Your First Line a “Say It Like You’d Text It” Headline
You have seconds to earn attention. And clarity beats cleverness every time.
If your headline wouldn’t fly in a group chat, it won’t work on a landing page. Write like you talk – then tighten it. Great landing pages don’t try to impress. They try to make sense.
Donald Miller calls this the “grunt test”: can a caveman understand it in 2 seconds? You’re not writing slogans. You’re removing friction.
Example: “Finally, skincare that doesn’t burn your face off.” No metaphors. Just meaning.
Most brands lose the sale before the scroll. Because clever headlines don’t convert – they confuse. And confusion doesn’t make money.
The job of your headline isn’t to be witty – it’s to get read.
2. Cut the Fluff – Especially in Your Value Prop
Once your headline buys attention, your value prop has to buy belief. Your product isn’t the hero – your customer is. And most brands make the fatal mistake of leading with themselves.
“We believe in innovation.” “We’re revolutionizing the industry.” Cool. But what’s in it for me?
Joanna Wiebe says: Lead with the benefit. It’s not “Advanced tech for better sleep.” It’s “Fall asleep in 5 minutes – and stay asleep all night.” That one line outperforms your entire About page.
Benefit-driven copy is clearer. Clarity builds trust. Trust builds sales. The fluff is costing you more than you think.
3. Fix Your CTA: Be Direct, Not Cute
But none of it matters if your CTA doesn’t make them click.
“Let’s do this” sounds fun – but it’s vague. Unclear CTAs make people wonder: What happens if I click? And the second they hesitate, they’re gone.
Joanna Wiebe calls them conversion triggers: “Shop Now.” “Get Your Size.” “Claim My 15% Off.” That’s clarity in action.
Not “Start the Journey.” Not “Let’s Go.” Tell them exactly what they’re getting.
Vague CTAs make people pause. Clear CTAs give them permission. Permission turns into action.
Uncertainty doesn’t convert – clarity does.
Bonus: Eliminate Choice Paralysis With One Clear Action
If you give them 5 things to do, they’ll choose none. Landing pages aren’t menus – they’re funnels. But most brands try to do too much at once: “Shop Now,” “View Bundles,” “Read Reviews,” “Follow on TikTok.”
That’s not optionality. That’s friction.
Alex Hormozi says: a great offer is one people understand instantly. Your entire page should support one action. One idea. One click. One path.
Distraction is expensive. Clarity is profitable. And simplicity always wins.
Don’t give them more to click. Give them more reason to click once.
Clarity Beats Clever. Every Time.
Most e-commerce brands don’t have a design problem – they have a clarity problem. They chase aesthetics, cleverness, and agency lingo, forgetting the one thing customers actually want: understanding.
Fixing your landing page doesn’t require a new layout. Just new language.
Start with a headline that sounds like a text. Cut the fluff and lead with the benefit. Make your CTA a confident promise, not a branding experiment. Then remove anything that distracts from the one action you want them to take.
Don’t redesign – rewrite. Because the brands that win aren’t louder. They’re clearer.
If this resonated, here’s what to do next:
→ If you’re tired of content that fills space instead of driving sales, let’s talk. Schedule a quick demo.
→ If you’re ready to turn product pages, email flows, landing copy, and more into silent salespeople for your brand, subscribe to either our Unlimited Standard Plan or Unlimited Professional Plan to get started.
Your story deserves better than generic copy.
We make it unforgettable.